Eat Her More Often!

  • Patricia S.

    Rank #529 of 1949

    Votes: 13

    About my essay:

    In which I call out food manufacturers, reality television, big pharma, instant gratification, (and other American peccadilloes including Heidi Klum and Kate Gosselin!) while explaining that cooking well is the last personal freedom we own.


Maybe we need to turn the question around.  Maybe we need to ask, “Why do people choose NOT to cook well?”


In a nutshell, some answers might be:


No time




Unwillingness to learn


Put those same responses on a resume and think you’ll ever get hired, paid or remain employed?  Nyet.


Why doesn’t everybody just stay at home and not get out of bed in the morning?  Why not forego brushing your teeth, proper grammar, bathing or going to work?  Why put a tourniquet on that bleeding leg or nurture our children?  Why bother voting?


You get what you pay for.  And more often than not, a lot less than you bargained for.  Especially when you don’t.  (Even in the food business, there’s a Cheney in charge.)  If you buy Phyllis Diller, don’t expect Heidi Klum.  Beware of packaging.




The problem is that most of what we’re fed is the very same thing that’s killing us.  There is more due process in our digestive tracts than in our courts.  Unfortunately, we’re not fined for these continuous, poor choices.  Instead, we’re rewarded for waking up and simply breathing.  We’ve not only come to expect it, but to demand it as well.


It’s the American way, after all.


Breast implants?  Buy them. 

Sex and love?  Available online.

Pizza?  Call delivery.


Instant gratification and cooking well are about as compatible as Kate Gosselin and birth control.  And, if there’s no three star Michelin restaurant or reality show in your immediate future for taking pride in something and attempting to do it well, why bother to do it at all when you can watch it on demand or order it by phone? 


Let someone else do if for us. 


Which is exactly what most people do.


It’s convenient.


In our high fructose “America is number one” stupor we have actually come to believe this tripe.  So why do our diets, obesity and alarming health statistics indicate otherwise?


The answer is because we’re lazy.


I would no sooner buy a poorly built vehicle or home than I would perform open-heart surgery upon myself.  Every food item that is created, packaged and marketed for the sake of “convenience” is barely a notion of what it once was in its raw state. 


Do we even consider the expense of Frankensteining all these “foods” and the cost to our bodies and minds?  Of course not.  We’re too busy getting therapy and being treated with pills for the very things that ail us. 


So to answer the question, I can’t afford not to cook well. Health insurance is more expensive.  I care more and enough about what I put into my mouth and body because it is one of the few remaining things over which I have any control.   And so do you.   


One day, I’ll open a restaurant called “Eat Her More Often” that proves I care as much about the product as I do the process.


And none of that can be manufactured.


Joan H.:

This is terrific!

September 28, 2010 Report Abuse
Sheila S.:

Clever and well done!

September 28, 2010 Report Abuse
Ld L.:

I've got some ideas for that EHMO sign...

September 28, 2010 Report Abuse
Mary H.:

"There is more due process in our digestive tracts than in our courts." Best line EVER!

September 28, 2010 Report Abuse
Holly C.:

wait - i think this is about me (i confess, kraft mac and cheese is my all-time favorite food!), but you raise excellent points, even if it makes me feel guilty.  voted!

September 29, 2010 Report Abuse
Linda S.:


September 29, 2010 Report Abuse
Bellwether V.:

Yeah, I too want to see the sign for that restaurant.

September 29, 2010 Report Abuse